


Fake Happy

by Lackadaisy_scribbles



Category: Kortia (Visual Novel)
Genre: Anyway Adventurer is not having a good time, I really don't envy them, being isekai’d to another world against your will is probably a terrifying experience, if they're mentioned more than once they get mentioned in the tags
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-02
Updated: 2020-12-02
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:20:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27844369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lackadaisy_scribbles/pseuds/Lackadaisy_scribbles
Summary: Lydia's life had no direction. She was at the periphery of people's consciousness, but never at the center. She'd accepted from a young age that this was her role for eternity. To be the observer of the warmth and happiness of others, but never have that for herself.She'd put on a good show of being the perfect foster child, the perfect student, the perfect colleague.However, deep in her heart, she wished to be part of something. To not feel so lonely.She should have been more specific.
Kudos: 3





	Fake Happy

Lydia had been floundering for a while now.

As a child, she watched with tired eyes as those around her would be adopted, new parents’ wish of extending their family being granted at last. As she watched her friends delve into their new family’s car and drive off into the distance, she silently wept knowing it’d never be her.

So she’d been shuffled from foster family to foster family like an afterthought.

Some foster parents were better than others. Some she didn’t want to remember. One family had led her to believe she’d finally be adopted, only to pull the rug under her feet when she overheard them discussing the paycheck for taking care of her. It was always about the money.

People couldn’t be trusted, and there was no point trying to befriend people when you were never in one place for too long. So she bid her time, waiting to grow old enough to be cycled out the system. She traded people for nature, for the flowerbeds and trees could never break her heart as much as another person.

As she drew her surroundings, she’d ignore the pang of envy when sketching the happy families in town. If she could immortalize the moment for them in ink, it’d be enough. She knew by now that she was never the participant, only the observer.

She’d become quite good at playing pretend, pretending that her smile was real, that she was happy. She’d become so good in fact, that she managed to fool even herself.

Lydia was well-liked around campus, for she knew that deep down what people desired was to feel appreciated. She’d listen to what people would say, but nobody noticed that her smile was a little too strained to be genuine, her eyes a little too bright to be truly happy. Perfect, polite Lydia Grey, who never spoke about herself.

In truth, she didn’t think she could.

It was particularly ironic that as soon as her life began to have some semblance of normalcy, she’d be ripped out and dropped in a completely different world, having to claw her way back up from square one once more.

It was tiring.

She’d gotten her wish of being part of something, she supposed. However, she wasn’t herself. No…she couldn’t be herself. Lydia of Valluria may have shared her name, but she had traded her paints and plants for livestock and cattle.

She lived on a farm, once.

The Byrathes were kind people. At least they probably were deep down. Byrus may have been vulgar and not very well-read, but he was good-natured. Lady Byrathes was more mysterious, more closed off. More like her.

It was easy to slip back into old habits when your life was on the line. When in doubt, smile and nod. Her ignorance of this world was aggravating but she’d never push away the opportunity to learn for the sake of her pride. So she endured the teasing and the barbs about her supposed lack of knowledge. Once she had the opportunity she’d learn all she could about this world. She'd read as many books as she could and fade into her comfortable spot in the background.

It seemed that this world had other ideas.

It was supposed to be a short stop at the Summerset mansion, another party that she could wait out and bide her time for until the heiress joined them and they could finally leave. Not only was small talk draining, but particularly pushy people could ask her where she’s from. It wasn’t as if she could have simply asked Jack what the various countries and their capitals were without seeming suspicious. She was already walking a thin line about that already.

There was the other elephant in the room. The nightmares that had plagued her mind since the start of the day, of the murderous elf and the dying princess. Despite her best efforts, she had barely paid attention to Jack speaking next to her, because all she could see when she spot that same elf’s sheathed sword was a blade dripping with her own blood.

She’d agreed to step out from the party with him anyway because apparently old habits die hard. And she was anything if not polite.

What she didn’t expect was a fight to break out between the elf and a newcomer, some so-called adventurer whose relaxed personality didn’t quite hide his skill. Although she hated fighting, in both participating and as a witness, she had to admit she was impressed.

Though, she couldn’t bring herself to trust anyone. Not fully anyway. This Kor individual may have been friendly enough, but he was elusive. As soon as the conversation had turned towards himself, he’d left soon after. Not that she couldn’t blame him, she knew all too well about perfecting the art of avoiding personal questions.

However, in a world where information had power, unknowns were dangerous. Her newfound surroundings had made it quite clear that if she didn’t blend in, it was game over.

The announcer would love that.

When they had finally left, she was immensely relieved. She was relieved enough until her travel companions had confronted her about her lack of conversation. Or at least, to ask her about her own backstory. She’d been foolish to think she’d avoid it.

It was a fair question. So she told them the truth.

At least, most of the truth.

The best lies were the ones that stemmed from reality after all. Her explanation seemed to be a sufficient answer for Jack, but for Gerald she wasn’t so sure. He’d already caught her unawares before, and people like him were suspicious not only by nature but out of necessity.

If there was anybody at risk at discovering her true nature, it would be the supposed merchant Gerald Yori. When Jack asked her to check on Alexis, she tried to hide her eagerness at the prospect of escaping Gerald’s hawkish eyes.

So colour her surprised that when they all went their separate ways, she had been struck with a sudden revelation; she had no clue of where to go next.

She had the errands the Byrathes sent for her of course. She knew her task, but that wasn’t the problem. She nervously looked out at the cobblestone streets, full of people who came from all walks of life, conversing as if it came second nature to them. If it wasn’t for the fact that some of them had a few more animalistic traits than human and that those “pawn” items replaced handheld devices, she could have fooled herself into believing that she was in her own city back on earth.

It was too much.

Lydia ignored the side streets and colourful shops in favour of the fountain within the town square. Shakily sitting down, the alien reflection of this person’s body she currently inhabited stared back at her.

She couldn’t do this. There was too much information she didn’t know, and too much that had been given suddenly. What were these gods thinking? If they were hoping for a show, they’d be horribly disappointed. She was never in the center of the action for a reason. She just wasn’t that kind of person. A world where magic and fighting were commonplace was one she could never hope to fit into.

If things continued on their current trajectory, she’d surely die.

“Looking kinda lonely there, aren’t ya?”

She knew that voice, she’d heard it barely a few hours ago.

Lydia turned to see Kor’s lilac eyes staring quizzically back at her. But it wouldn’t do to break down in front of a stranger would it? So instead she smiled in greeting.

After all, old habits were hard to break.

**Author's Note:**

> The chapter title comes from the song "Fake Happy" by Paramore, I think it really suits my adventurer oc Lydia. Although, I'm starting to think I have a theme of naming my fics after song titles. 
> 
> I also do art! 
> 
> Check it out on Tumblr @Lackadaisy-scribbles :D


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